Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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