gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
