she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
