So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
