Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
