You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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