is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
