problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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