i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
