North Korea, Best Korea!
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
