don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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