Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
