dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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