My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
