I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
