Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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