Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
