And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize