Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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