I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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