He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
