Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
