i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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