it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Randomize