Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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