she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
