After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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