I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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