Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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