Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
