I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
