I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Randomize