Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
