Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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