I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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