On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
