Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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