16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
