with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
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