i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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