Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Princesses don't give blow jobs
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize
