So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
