We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize
