He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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