The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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