he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize
