He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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