high people should be assigned attendants
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
