I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize