what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize